Monday, September 2, 2013

Night Driving

Headlights on

Beams shining

Showing us what lies ahead

Frame by frame

What’s in front of us

Appears and disappears

Navigating our way

Through ever-changing roads

Through storms

Rain blowing sideways

Downpours that cause zero visibility

We slow down

Still moving forward

Correcting our pace

Speeding up

Driving at night

In the dark

Is an act of faith

Requiring us to trust

The headlights

Our Self

In ways that aren’t necessary

In the light of day

But night comes

Darkness falls upon all of us

We tune in

We remind our Self

That we will be shown

Moment by moment

Where we are

How we are feeling (truly!)

What we need

Our ability to “be”

Right here and now

Frees us

From being consumed by the night

By the fear of the unknown

By the resistance to what “is”

Present to life

Fully engaged in the moment

Brings a flood of light

No matter where we find our Self.

Saturday night, I drove for almost 4 hours through dark country roads that I had never traveled with lightning blazing through the skies – revealing majestic views only made possible through these rare conditions; through flooded interstates with reflectors barely flickering and through torrential downpours that robbed me of any visibility; through windy roads that I know like the back of my hands that I have traveled over and over for 20 years but never exactly like this under these extreme circumstances.  I love storms and I love driving so I was strangely energized by the adventure I found myself in even when I had to slow down – passing trees in the road, people off in ditches being assisted by the police and tow trucks, winds gusting so harshly they shook my car.

I was struck by what a perfect metaphor night driving is for life itself.  The power of resting in the moment, staying right here and now – not worrying how I will ever make it where I want to go and not wasting energy doubting that I can get there.  The head lights show me frame by frame what is, what lies ahead of me immediately appearing and disappearing only to bring me to the next frame.  This is faith, a living faith as I trusted myself to stay tuned in and meet what comes which is necessary in order to free me from the grips of fear, of darkness consuming me and disengaging me from life unfolding.

A dear friend and I were talking about this process as it applies to grief.  Under such harsh circumstances, we are forced to live one moment at a time, one day at a time because looking any further than that can cause us to crash and burn, reeling in the intensity of the How’s??? How the hell will I make it? How the hell will I ever be able to navigate this? How the hell will life play out?  How the hell will I ever feel good again? How the hell will I feel alive again?  How the hell did I get here?  How the hell is this my life?  How the hell will life go on?

But right here in now bringing our Self into the moment, breathing it in, breathing it out, sipping in life, the light – THE HOPE shows us where we are, how we are feeling, what we need.   Click!  Click!  Click!  Frame by frame, we meet life on life’s terms like a movie projector flashing images.  There is a rest here that allows light to flow through even our darkest moments that cause sheer terror. 

The invitation this day is to ground in the moment, trust all that lies within you and let it guide you and inform you and companion you as you navigate the unexpected, the extremes that life can throw out you.  You don’t have to look any further than right here and now.  Rest in this knowing that all is well in this moment no matter what chaos is spinning outside of you.  Night driving hones our skills to walk by faith.

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