Friday, May 31, 2013

Every Storm Runs Out of Rain

The storms of life blow in
Sweep us off our feet
Pick us up and carry us
Into worlds within this world
That we never imagined existed.
And then the storm runs out of rain
Calm returns
We find new ground
But we are not the same
As the storm has forever altered the course of our life
And somehow
We find a way to be grateful
For even that which we cursed.

There is a country song performed and co-written by Gary Allen titled:  Every Storm Runs Out of Rain.  I couldn’t tell you the lyrics because I have only heard it a few times but the images it brings forward for me and the emotions it stirs assure me that I am not alone, that the human experience that we share is one of shattering pain that nothing can prepare us for or protect us from and one of joy so magnificent and miraculous that we hold our hearts with a sense of awe.    

It matters not the force of the storms we endure, each of us must find our way to new ground and allow who we have become to navigate this unexpected path in a life we don’t yet see.  With each step, we discover we are far more than we believed our Self to be tapping into more strength, courage, and wisdom than we have ever known.  Sure-footed in the ruins of a life that was, stumbling through the rocky terrain yet staying the course, standing taller than before in a sense of Self that transcends the circumstances.  And we eventually find a way to be grateful for even that which we have cursed.

We truly are the heroes in our own adventures.  In our natural tendency to compare our Self to others, we can lose sight of the beauty of our own life filled with moments of tragedy and moments of triumph, moments where fear grips us so tightly we become paralyzed and moments where we soar magically riding on waves of grace.  The people we call our heroes throughout history are mirrors of all that lies within us.  We are drawn to these kindred souls who are no longer in physical form but the spirit of their lives still blaze and illuminate because they are hope that no matter what the storms bring, we can carry on.  And each of us is hope.  Our personal stories and collective story are filled with the energy of hope:  Keep on going…Never Give Up…I think I can!  I think I can!  I can!

I love this human journey and those who share it with me.  I don’t have to know the details of everyone’s story to know that at some point they have faced storms that they wondered if the rain would ever stop.  Our stories play out differently but no one walks through this life unscathed. 

The invitation this day is to acknowledge the hero that you are and the hope that you pass on simply by being you and standing tall after being knocked to your knees by life’s storms.  And for those of you still waiting for the storm to run out of rain, know that the whole of humanity stands with you as well as the heavenly realms infusing you with the energy of hope.

I leave you with these words written by my kindred soul sister, Louisa May Alcott:  I am no longer afraid of the storms for I am learning to sail my ship.  May she rest in peace knowing she sailed her ship brilliantly all her days here on earth.

Thursday, May 30, 2013

Grounding Our Gifts

Each of us
Has a bounty of gifts
Waiting to be acknowledged
And harvested.
The gifts exist
Whether we recognize them or not
But when we ground them
Own them
Say thanks
For the privilege to share them
The JOY of this life is ours.

I remember the first time I met Dr. Amy Yang, an M.D. who specializes in Chinese acupuncture.  She was centered, nurturing, intuitive and brilliant as she systematically took care of several patients at once with a waiting room full.  My general practitioner had referred me to Dr. Yang giving me her phone number and address explaining that she was not listed in the phone book.  This amazed me how she could build a business without advertising and not being publicly listed where people could find her so I asked her about it.  She said that there wasn’t a need because her business was word of mouth and she trusted that whoever needed her would find their way to her.  My questions continued as I was intrigued by her, this rare bird grounded in a sense of Self and her gifts.  I asked if she was the first acupuncturist in Indianapolis to which she replied without hesitation:  I am not the first but I am the best.

Her words still resonate within me:  I am not the first but I am the best.  I wanted to ground in my gifts the way that Dr. Yang had.  I didn’t want to play small anymore or carry a false sense of humility that has tinges of shame in claiming all that I am.  Her words, her sense of Self opened the invitation for me to step into my Self with abiding appreciation for what I have been given this lifetime and the joy in sharing it.

At the beginning of this year as I was in conversation with the universe, I heard myself say:  Let me be a good steward of my gifts.  This spontaneous conversation always brings great insight as to where I am and what I truly want.  The follow up to this prayer for my life was an inquiry into:  What are my gifts? And how do I want to use them?

Even after writing my book Passing On Hope six years ago, I struggled to own that I am a writer.  But now I know I am so I began to ground this gift through sharing my writing via my daily blog.  I didn’t want to wait to finish another book to put my writing out into the world and feel grateful for this vehicle to express myself; and I continue to be shocked and thrilled by the generous responses that come my way and that people actually take the time out of their busy day to read it.  I write because I must not because I think I should.  There is no sense of duty or obligation.  Writing simply brings such joy to my life.  And whatever my writing does, the effect it has on people is grace at work through me.

When I began to lead workshops eight years ago, I was invited by my friend, Nikki, to co-facilitate a leadership program.  People would ask me about my credentials and how I came to be in this position.  I used to tease with Nikki saying:  because I am friends with Nikki and she asked me.  Humor helped me deal with the fact that I could not see the gifts I brought to the table.  I didn’t value my wisdom, my ability to be vulnerable in sharing my humanness, my intuition in reading what was really being said so I could mirror this back to others, my unique way of saying things in a way people could hear or the way I could hold space for wherever people were with no judgment or agenda.

Although I no longer lead workshops, I appreciate and use these gifts in my coaching and numerology sessions.  Grounding these gifts, seeing how they serve others in helping them to remember all that they are and be excited to live their personal adventure; to release the shame that binds them to old patterns and beliefs that clog their vitality; to enjoy the freedom that comes from exercising their power of choice leaves me with a sense of awe that I get to do what I do.  I truly say Thank you! all day long.

The first time I spoke to a group was ten years ago at the invitation of a client who asked me to deliver a message of hope to a team of distribution employees who were stressed out due to the chaos of increasing productivity and over-time.  It was magic as we connected through the stories I weaved of rising to the occasion, seizing the opportunities, coming together, using humor and finding a way to enjoy the ride no matter what.  People would come up to me quoting their favorite one-liners and I had no recall of saying what they heard.  Speaking, storytelling is home to me now, but it took several years to see the abundance of this gift that had been bestowed on me.  I show up and get out of the way, surrendering to what needs to come through, being the vessel that is confident it will get wherever it needs to go.  When corresponding with the organizers who hire me, I find myself saying over and over:  It is my JOY to be a part of your event.  It is.

The invitation this day is to ground your gifts remembering:
Each of us
Has a bounty of gifts
Waiting to be acknowledged
And harvested.
The gifts exist
Whether we recognize them or not
But when we ground them
Own them
Say thanks
For the privilege to share them
The JOY of this life is ours.

Be a good steward of your gifts.  The world needs your JOY in sharing them.

Wednesday, May 29, 2013

Answers Come with Time and Love

It is our nature to look outside
Of our Self
For the answers
But with time and love
We find the answers
Where they have been all along
Within us
And come to see that the time and love
Was necessary
Was essential
To arriving at the answers.

In my work as a life coach and numerologist, I do not see my role as giving others the answers rather as standing with them, making safe space so they can journey within, learn to trust their Self and remember the song in their hearts so they can live their truest life. 

It is funnier than hell for me to hear people’s responses when I share that I am a life coach.  Some will speak of their personal stories with coaching which are a mix of horror stories and profoundly life-enhancing experiences where the gratitude is palpable.  Last week, a no nonsense guy named Jonathan from around the Georgia-Florida line said with his sweet southern draw:  Excuse me for what I am about to say, but you basically teach’em how to grow a pair.  I loved his bluntness and laughed along with him explaining that to me growin’ a pair is living our truth which is tough for all of us.  And facing our Self honestly requires patience and time as the answers bubble up organically when we are ready; and this is only possible when we can love all of our Self, the stuff we see as crappy and flawed as well as the stuff we actually like and appreciate.  He nodded silently pausing to take it all in and then added:  You sure have a sense of connection to people.  I agreed with him and said that this comes from knowing my Self and connecting compassionately with my Self, understanding that this human journey is messy and magnificent – both!

I have a sign with vibrant splashes of red, pink, orange, yellow, green and aqua that says:  She knew the answers would come with time and love.  Often, we have to start with looking outside of our Self for the answers, referencing who we believe to be experts and adopting what friends and family believe are the reasonable answers.  Looking outside of our Self is necessary but prevents us from dropping into where we really need to go.  Ultimately, we must go within to discover the truth, our personal truth.  This truth is not meant to be understood by anyone but us. But oh, we will share it expecting others to affirm us, understand us, approve of us, love us and even applaud us.  Many will not support your truth especially if it threatens their beliefs of how things should be or affects their life.

There is a moment where we see the truth that we must give our Self the unconditional understanding, the complete acceptance and the unwavering love that we long for others to give us and release them from this expectation.  The seas part, the veils lift and:  We find the answers where here they have been all along…Within us…And come to see that the time and love…Was necessary…Was essential…To arriving at the

The invitation this day is to trust your Self above all else, knowing the answers come with time and love.

Tuesday, May 28, 2013

No Internet, No Shoes, No Problems...

The instant we become aware
That we are making a mountain out of a molehill
That we are creating a problem with our way of thinking
That we have the power of choice to pause, to assess and to shift
Into a new perspective
The whole of our life changes
And we are free
To enjoy life
As it is.

I headed to my houseboat on Lake Cumberland to enjoy Memorial Day weekend with my family.  It was my first trip of the season so there were things to do to officially open the boat like clean, purge and reorganize.  I had also planned to catch up on my backlog of emails and to write my blog. 

Enjoying time with the family was easy.  From the moment we gathered, we laughed literally until we almost wet our swim suits as we told stories, caught up on each other’s lives, played the dominos game, Mexican Train, watched Bridesmaids again, and ate a balance of good food off the grill and junk that goes along with being on vacation.  It never ceases to amaze me at how far we have come as individuals and as a family where we truly allow each other to be who we are and where we are respectfully and lovingly.  The appreciation we have for how each of us is wired and how we uniquely view the world creates rich conversation that expands the goodness of this life.

Cleaning, purging and reorganizing helped me to ground in present time and to make space for the new season of my life and at the lake.  Seeing John’s handwriting in permanent marker instructing me as to which switch does what and which key goes to what made me smile in that he continues to take care of me in such a practical sense.  There were photos of John covering the frig, a memorial tribute that I chose to pare down to just a few.  Even though I had gotten rid of most of his clothes, his swim trunks were still in the dresser drawer so I packed them up and gave them away.  Going through the cabinets and the storage under the hull, I announced that no one ever needs to bring trash bags, razors, Qtips or deodorant because there is a lifetime supply thanks to John.  The humor and the actual clearing out of the old moved energy through me in ways I could never have anticipated which made me see the miracle of not just my ability to be at the lake, but to love it, to feel nourished by it and to make plans for all that is to come there.

Blogging and catching up on email was not to be due to no internet access.  Technology is a beautiful thing.  I can remember a time when I had to ride my Sea Doo over to the gas dock a few times each day to use the pay phone to check in with my business because my pager didn’t work, cell phones were rare and if you had one, there was no coverage in remote areas so I give thanks for how far we have come even though it is hit or miss.  There were summers that John and I spent on the lake that wouldn’t have been possible without internet and cell phones that permitted us to conduct business.  Of course, it is frustrating when things don’t go as planned so I was feeling this as I tried to post my blog and get onto my email.  But the instant I became aware that I was making a mountain out of a molehill, that I was creating a problem by my way of thinking and that I had the power of choice to shift into a new perspective, everything changed and I was free to enjoy life as it was:  No Internet, No Shoes, No Problems.
There is a sign that hangs inside my houseboat which was an anniversary gift from John that continues to inspire:  Gather with Grateful Hearts.  To be grateful for life, for the day, for the moment of awareness and clarity creates a level of freedom where our joy is unconditional.  We can curse things for not going our way and feel the frustration AND we can pause, assess and shift into a new perspective that lightens our hearts and releases the tension. 

The invitation this day is to own your power of choice and to exercise it over and over again as problems arise grounded in a sense of responsibility for your life and the life you want to create.  There will never be a time when we aren’t challenged by life but your response to the events changes everything.

Saturday, May 25, 2013

My Kentucky Home

How can a place
Contain what was, what is and what will be
So magnificently?
Leaving us with a sense of all the roads traveled
That have converged
To lead us into this moment
Where everything is possible
And the joy in this knowing
Fills the cracks from the weathering of life
And we are made whole.

Arriving at my Kentucky home, my houseboat on Lake Cumberland, I felt the rest it makes possible.  This is a place over the last 20 years where I have said over and over:  I find more of my Self here and this is still true.  The foothills tree-lined with rocks at the base hug every square inch of this lake and all of us tucked in this piece of paradise.

One year ago today, I arrived here on what was a blazing hot day.  I pushed the wheel barrel full of my essentials for the weekend out to my houseboat and was drenched in sweat so I spontaneously threw on my swimsuit and jumped in the lake.  I began to cry feeling all that was, all that is and all that will be.  The year before, I had decided to sell the boat not wanting to be here anymore but on this day, I knew that being here fed me in a way that nothing else can.  I climbed up the ladder out of the water and dripping wet, I went inside to get the scissors and cut down the For Sale banner that covered the front of the boat.  The neighbors on the dock cheered me on tearfully, delighting in my choice to stay.

Nothing is the same because nothing can stay the same yet here I am, okay with what was, what is and what will be.  My drive from Nashville to the boat took me on new roads with views of Tennessee that were far different than my route from Indianapolis but they were equally awe-inspiring.  I didn’t get to go across Wolf Creek Dam as I have done a thousand times with all my windows rolled down blasting my music and saying Hello! to the lake.  But I did get to soak up new vistas as I blazed the new trail here companioned by travelin’ tunes that had me dancing in my seat.

I walked inside the houseboat announcing:  I’m here…And being silly asked my late-husband, John:  Are you here, my love? My sister, her husband, my niece and her fiancĂ© laughed along with me.  I said: Wouldn’t it be crazy if he started flashing the lights to let us know he’s here? and they agreed.  And just then, a black and yellow butterfly swooped around the front of the houseboat, dancing about, leaving us all still in the knowing that John is indeed here with us.  My brother in-law tried to blow it off and then, he joined in reaching his arm out for the butterfly to land and perch.  It was a powerful moment filling us with the magic of this place, a place where our greatest memories were carved from the play and John and my wedding day to our greatest sorrow where John lived his final moments out and breathed his last breath. 

As the night fell and we were basking in the glory of the day, my sister commented that the butterfly was definitely John reminding us that he is with us in spirit and it is a sign for our new beginnings here in this season and this life – leaving us with a sense of all the roads traveled that have converged to lead us into this moment where everything is possible and the joy in this knowing fills the cracks from the weathering of life and we are made whole.

Friday, May 24, 2013

When's the Last Time...?


Things we did so naturally in childhood
Fade away seamlessly
We can’t recall exactly when we stopped
Screaming at the top of our lungs for no reason
Skipping down the sidewalk
Twirling around in circles until we were dizzy
Sprinting full speed to the stop sign on the corner
Rolling down the grassy hill
Stepping over cracks so we wouldn’t break our momma’s back
But what if the invitation to reclaim this innate playfulness
Awakened a sense of joy
That reminded you being here, being alive is everything.


The question:  When was the last time? came from a conversation with my two new friends from New York, Joe and Greg.  Joe shared that he and his buddies were discussing:  When was the last time you screamed at the top of your lungs for no reason?  When was the last time you sprinted full speed running down the street?  These things that we do so naturally in childhood fade away and yet, when we allow ourselves to express these things the release that comes feels so good.   

The movie Big starring Tom Hanks flashes into my mind.  He is physically a man but still a child.  People love him and are intrigued by his sense of curiosity, the way he sees the world, the things that fly out of his mouth and the unconventional way he lives.  We all delight in the famous scene where he literally jumps on the giant floor piano at FAO Schwartz playing Heart and Soul as he leaps from note to note, drawing a crowd who applaud this man living with childlike wonder.

That child inside of all of us longs to come out and play even if we only permit it in controlled environments when we are safe among friends and family who love us no matter how foolish or silly we may appear.  Who think:  You’re so crazy! and love us for it even if they don’t choose to join in.  But the joy we experience engulfs all who share this life with us so our excitement in the play is infectious and often contagious where others jump in laughing and scratching their heads in disbelief: I don’t know the last time I did this.

Memorial Day weekend is upon us so I am heading to my houseboat on Lake Cumberland where I intend to play with family and friends as this lightens my heart and reminds me that I am here in this life to experience joy.  I will plunge into the waters no matter how cold because I simply must – it marks the beginning of the boating season.  I will swim through the back channel secretly playing Mermaid splashing around on my adventure and delighting in the magic found only in the water.  We will sit on the top of the houseboat soaking up the sun all day and gazing at the stars at night, telling stories we have told a thousand times and laughing again and again as if we had never heard them before, feeding off each other’s joy and silliness, listening to Johnny Cash, John Mellencamp, The Rolling Stones and all our favorites from throughout the years that are in line with our carefree time away from the responsibilities that normally fill our days.  And yes, I will be asking them:  When's the last time…? 

The invitation this day is to reclaim this innate sense of playfulness that awakens your sense of joy (whatever that means for you) and reminds you that being here, being alive is everything.

Thursday, May 23, 2013

And There’s More to Come


Life goes on and on and on
With or without our consent
Ebbing and flowing
With or without our participation
Doing what it does
Perpetual motion cycling
Beginnings and endings
Death and Rebirth
Planting and Harvesting
Pruning and Blossoming
Cocooning and Metamorphosing  

My late husband, John, visited me last night in my dream state and connecting with him in this way is so sacred that even though I consider myself an open book, I can feel hesitant to share the experiences fearing the resonance of love, truth and beauty will be lost in my attempt to translate it.   He stood there glowing, light gently pouring from him and engulfing me as we smiled together from the depths of us completely integrated, an energetic union standing there as one.  He simply said:  We had a good time, didn’t we, Gee?  I didn’t respond with words.  Every fiber of my being resounded Yessssss! Delighting…nodding in agreement at this simple yet profound truth.  He added:  And there’s more to come.  Again, I silently said Yessssss!  with all of me.  We began to laugh hysterically together as we had done in our life we had shared, yet I knew this was not an attempt for him to remind me of what was rather he was assuring me of what is.

It is just like him to throw these one-line zingers at me, summing up our life together so poetically in the brevity:  We had a good time, didn’t we, Gee?  That statement reminds me that having a good time, looking for the good in all times is everything and in the end, all that remains is the good that rises from this life.  This doesn’t mean there weren’t times that didn’t feel so damn good, facing painful pruning only to blossom magnificently, tumbling clumsily lost in the death of who we were only to be reborn into who we always wanted to become, planting seeds and trusting the bounty of the harvest would come, maybe not on our terms but they would surely come.  And there’s (always) more to come.  
A friend gave me a print with angels splashed all around it with the message:  Faith is the place between where you are and the good things that are sure to come.  Sip that in.

Talking to a dear friend from Brownsburg, she said:  Just think if you had known your life would be where it is today when John died 2 ½ years ago.  Who could have known?  The truth is I knew that there was more to come.  I knew that in the tragedy there were gifts that I couldn’t yet see because I had to allow the grief to swallow me, shatter me, cut out what was inessential, all that I couldn’t take with me in order to be born again into this new life.  There is no bypassing the death so we must kick and scream and soothe our Self with the knowing that good will surely come.
Good comes because life doing what it does is in perpetual motion cycling beginnings and endings.  With or without our consent, life ebbs and flows, taking us where we don’t always want to go.  But if we trust that good will come even from the crap we want to pray away, life becomes easier, less bumpy and jolting as we ride the waves whether they are gentle or swift.

The invitation this day is no matter where you are in life to look for the good.  Set an intention:  I am going to have a good time today!  And rest in this knowing:  There will be more…There will (always!) be more GOOD to come.

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Amazing Grace

Miracles blow through us
Doing what we alone cannot
Allowing us to see with clarity what had escaped us
Bringing forth wisdom that explains the mystical
Revealing the beauty even in the horrors of this life
Helping us let go of what we had gripped so tightly
Ushering in new energies, new beginnings, new life.

Aaron Neville’s live! version of Amazing Grace was my late-husband, John’s favorite.  He would crank it up in his truck as we barreled down the road, singing this old spiritual hymn from the depths of him, his eyes welling up with tears from all that it stirred.  The lyrics poetic:  Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like me…I once was lost but now, I’m found…was blind but now I see.  This song is loved by humanity as it languages our soul’s journey, our personal odysseys that lead us home to our truest Self and our truest life through days we curse and days we bless.

We are people of miracles not because of anything in particular we do rather it is the amazing grace of the universe that parts the seas, makes the space, opens our eyes so we can see what was not possible before.  We feel lost one moment and the next, we have found our Self standing on new ground at immeasurable heights with a bird’s eye view of the world that we didn’t even know existed.  We are astonished.  How could this be?  It is amazing grace at work through each of our lives doing what we alone cannot. 

We are guided through these graces all our days.  This energy is ever- present, spiraling through our every breath, but our willingness to tune in, listen and trust the wisdom that arises is a healing balm even on the darkest days.  The bitter is made sweet in this connection.  And often, in spite of our Self, our resistance to believe in these assisting forces we cannot see, amazing grace creates the space, helps us let go of what we have gripped so tightly, ushering in new beginnings and new life.  This is miraculous and makes me sigh in the wonder and magnificence.

The tragedies of this world like the tornado in Kansas that break our hearts, take us to our knees, shatter the foundations on which we have stood can only be reconciled through the amazing grace that sweeps in to support us.  The well within us that holds us, that contains our pain and makes us whole in our shatteredness is this grace at work.  The mind will naturally try to make sense of that which makes no sense, attempting to process churning events over and over again, but it is grace that allows us to rest in the midst of the horrors we witness in this life.    

The invitation this day is to look to the past for evidence of amazing grace at work in your life so you can remember we are people of miracles.  Give thanks all day long sending silent thank you’s to these assisting forces.  Welcome it.  Expect it.  Trust when you ask for guidance, you receive it even when it doesn’t seem that way because you are attached to how it should unfold.  And even when you don’t ask, amazing grace will do what you alone cannot because it supports our highest good and greatest joy all our days.

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Lucky US!

Is an expression of the abundance
That is this gift of life.
To have breath in our bodies this day
Is to know richness beyond measure.
To acknowledge the fortune we possess
Within our being and within all experiences
Is to live in perpetual wealth.

A new friend texted a message of appreciation for our connection and time together, expressing her excitement over all the fun we had and all the fun that is sure to come.  I simply responded:  Lucky US!  And she messaged back:  YESSSS!  I love that:  Lucky US!  We are so lucky.

This expression, this acknowledgement of Luck has been spontaneous, a new word to language the energy I was feeling.  I heard myself begin to say it a few months ago when the server brought me my favorite Tuscan Kale Salad asking:  Tuscan Kale Salad?  To which I smiled and responded:  Yes!  Lucky me.  He agreed saying it is his favorite too and we had a chuckle together.

When I reflect on my life journey with my late-husband, John, I acknowledge how Lucky I am to have known such great love that continues to fuel my life and would never permit me to be a victim of his sudden death rather a recipient of the abundance we shared. 

Friends and family back in Indianapolis send cards, texts and emails letting me know they miss me and love me.  I soak this in and think:  Lucky me!  To be loved and to be missed is beautiful.

Now, I am not saying that we all don’t have moments where we aren’t feeling so Lucky.  I can’t help but think of the scene from The Bucket List where Jack Nicholson’s character is puking his guts up in the hospital bathroom after finishing a round of chemo.  He looks in the mirror feeling like hell and says:  Just think.  Some lucky son of bitch is dying of a heart attack right now…

Life is definitely a little bit of heaven and a little bit of hell inviting us to hold the paradox, be present to it all unconditionally which allows us to release the tension of the opposites, freeing us to experience the richness of life no matter what comes.

The lotto pay out of $370 million was a hot topic yesterday as I buzzed around town, talking about the Lucky winner.  People dreaming of what they would do, how their life would be different, painting a picture of something better, using their imagination to drop into the freedom that comes from that kind of wealth.  This is fun to do!  And I even believe it can help us identify wants and desires for our life that can stoke our creative fires and expand us.  But the invitation is to remember:  We are all LUCKY to have breath in our bodies this day.

The idea for this piece had come to me last night as I sat on my balcony breathing in the stars and the new moon, feeling the possibilities for my life and saying silently:  Lucky me…Lucky me…Lucky me.  On my way to the gym this morning, I saw the news flashing images of the devastation left behind in the wake of the tornadoes that blazed through Oklahoma.  24 are reported dead. 

I say it again.  The invitation this day is to remember:  We are all LUCKY to have breath in our bodies this day.  And, have fun in adopting the phrases:  Lucky me!  Lucky US!  Wherever you are:  Lucky me…I GET to do this.  Lucky me…I GET to live this life.  Lucky me…I get to celebrate another birthday, another day here on earth.  Lucky US…we get to enjoy this life together.  I promise that saying this will shift your energy into abundant living soaking up the richness found all of our days.  And if you aren't feeling so Lucky to be you and to be alive, use that information to inspire necessary changes, exercising your power of choices to create a life you feel Lucky to live.

Monday, May 20, 2013

Flying Our Freak Flags

There are parts of us hidden
Buried deep within us
Some we are conscious of
And some we aren’t
But when we dare to release those energies
Unclogging what has blocked our vitality
There is a JOY to life
That makes us wake up saying: 
Bring on the day!
Hot damn! 
Here I am!
(Well, this may be asking too much. 
may not be possible until our morning coffee or workout.)

One of my favorite lines of all time comes from the movie The Family Stone.  Sarah Jessica Parker plays the uptight girlfriend who goes home for Christmas with her boyfriend played by yummy Dermott Mulroney who is equally as serious and driven to prove his worth in the world through his success as a businessman.  They arrive at his parents' dressed in their uptown clothes, looking polished even after a long drive.  SJP even has a tight bun to top off the perfection she is wanting to project.  The family who are a cast of characters, not wanting to impress, comfortable in their messiness and with each other’s crap send SJP into a tailspin.  She has a complete meltdown and finds herself in a bar with Dermott Mulroney’s brother played by equally yummy Luke Wilson who is a free spirit to his core, making documentary films out in LA.  After a few drinks and listening to SJP sulk and play victim to his family, Luke Wilson tells her:  You know what your problem is, you have a freak flag but you just aren’t flying it. 

This invitation for SJP to fly her freak flag begins her liberation from perfectionism, trying to be who she thinks she should be and letting who she really is come out to play bringing a sense of joy and freedom that enlivens her and beautifies her as the painted mask is taken off.    

We all have freak flags, things that make us different and often, there is shame in being different, in not fitting in to the ideal standard we hold in our mind and that is projected on to us so we play the role of who we believe we should be.  There is pain in feeling different, like we don’t fit in and there is pain in trying to be who we aren’t in an attempt to fit in.   

A new friend who is a musician shared that he is painfully shy so we spoke at length about where the pain comes from which I believe is his inability to accept his shyness completely and be who he is.  His willingness to release the shame and be okay with being shy instead of trying to pretend he is otherwise is his ticket to freedom.  His eyes welled up as he stepped into that feeling of being in his truth.  We reviewed the amazing gifts his shyness has given him so he could appreciate who he is with fresh eyes.  He is a brilliant and soulful musician from being able to spend time in solitude and practice.  He goes within himself and brings new worlds to life which he graciously shares with audiences.  He is smart as hell devouring books on mythology that feed him.  He is at home being in nature so he works as an environmentalist protecting water ways and reefs, traveling wherever he is needed because he is comfortable within himself and can be alone.  I could go on and on and on about this remarkable human being.

When asked: What do you do?  I could rattle off my list of roles as writer, speaker, numerologist, coach, entrepreneur and so on (which are all roles I love and cherish) but I often say that I am privileged to help people free their JOY by giving them permission to be who they are, to own those parts of their Self they have unconsciously repressed or want to deny, inviting them to fly their freak flags by letting those unique aspects of who they are come out and play. 

I have no desire to mold people into who I think they should be perpetuating the shame that our culture uses to motivate change.  I just want to help people remember there is a joy to life that is so vast it will make us wake up and say:  Bring on the day!  Hot Damn!  Here I am!  Woohoo…I am passionate about loving my life every single day and want others to love life too. 

The Inquiry this day is:  What if what you believe is the most fu%#ed up part of you is actually the best part of you? (Judge Nothing.)  Your judgment will never serve you.  Your acceptance, your ability to love who you are will free the well of vitality within you.  And I leave you with this assurance:  I am human and not afraid to be human flaws and all.  I only know what I know from my own walk of liberation that continues and will continue until my last breath.  WOOHOO!!!  Bring it on.  Here I am.