Tuesday, June 11, 2013

Rainbows, Songs, Numbers, Butterflies, Smells, Dimes...


Following the Signs
Often subtle
But ever-present
Like bread crumbs
Marking a trail
Deep in the forest
Is a magical way
To tune into the Spirit World
With those we love who are no longer physically with us
Yet remain connected through the invisible threads
That are eternal.

When I walked into my houseboat Sunday, the clock read 11:17.  And when I arrived home on Monday, the clock read 11:17.  11:17 is John’s death date and it began to pop out at me immediately following his death where I can feel the numbers viscerally as if he is reaching from beyond energetically to touch me, to blow the winds of hope through me, and let me know he is with me and is actually a part of me and my life.    Every day, without fail, I see 11:17 whether I receive an email, text or phone call at that time or I am on a call for 11 minutes and 17 seconds.  It is a source of joy for me and reminds me to live in the mystery, in the magic of life where some things try as we might, cannot be explained and to try to do so would strip it of the pure beauty.

While at the houseboat, I got to visit with friends.  It was the 11 month anniversary of their son’s death.  The trip had been especially painful revisiting memories of his adventures on the lake over the years and wishing he was still here as images of him driving the boat, helping to tie off and do all the things he did flooded their psyches, torturing them.  But even in the midst of their grief and the range of feelings they were experiencing, they began to share how they had been following the signs that gave them hope to hang on another moment, another day and keep on going.  Soon after arriving, they found their son’s hat behind the sofa and clutched it physically as they would him if they could.  This was a gem sparkling even in the darkness.  Then, a neighbor on the dock who also had a son die a few years ago came by to visit, infusing them with hope as she poured her heart out speaking freely and honestly in a way most simply cannot or will not.  They were fed and nourished by her words and her presence, as she was evidence that we can endure the unendurable.  They were heading up the lake cruising in their houseboat when a rainbow spanned the sky magnificently and reached into the depths of them so they could feel the connection, the invisible thread that is eternal between them and their son.  As they headed home yesterday, they texted me a picture of another rainbow, sharing they had seen 3 more.  I could feel their sense of peace and the hope that is wash over them swaddling them tightly.

I have other friends that find dimes everywhere, just when they need them most, to feel the connection with departed loved ones.  Distinct smells flood into a moment as if our loved one walked through a portal.  Songs with deep meaning come on the radio or play as we walk into a store filling us with the knowing that they still walk with us.  People with similar eyes or energy that we encounter briefly leave us feeling as if we have physically been with the person we miss so dearly.  The signs are endless and a unique exchange between us and the souls on the other side.

The invitation this day is to Follow the Signs:
Often subtle
But ever-present
Like bread crumbs
Marking a trail
Deep in the forest
Is a magical way
To tune into the Spirit World
With those we love who are no longer physically with us
Yet remain connected through the invisible threads
That are eternal.

You are guided and loved beyond measure!

As I finish writing this, it is 11:17.  Imagine that!  Thanks, my love, for the eternal dance that is and will be all my days.

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