Will be our last
When that will be
None of know for sure
But to consciously
Enter the days of our lifetime
Acknowledging that this day
Is all we have
And there is no promise of tomorrow
Invites us to hold each day sacred
No matter what comes our way.
As I was driving home from the grocery store, I found myself behind a vehicle pulling a trailer with a Turf Tiger Scagg mower strapped to it. My late-husband, John, had this exact riding mower and loved cutting the acreage we lived on, riding up and down the hills making stripes and patterns that pleased him in a way that was foreign to me. I would rather sit inside where the air conditioning and ice water kept me cool on those hot summer days. Each of us has different ideas about what is enjoyable; and how we spend our days is how we spend our life so it is essential to be mindful of our choices not just in what we do, how we fill our days but our attitude, how we choose to view things.
The vehicle with the mower turned off and I headed down the road to my parking garage. Carrying my groceries as I walked to the elevator, this knowing, a message from John washed over me: Living every day like it is my last. John had this on his facebook home page. I had never seen this prior to his death when a friend urged me to get on there and read the outpouring of love sent via messages. He had said to me every day in the wake of his bypass surgery: There will never be another day just like this one so enjoy it; and expressed to me often, If today is my last day on earth, know that you made my life wonderful, Gee. After he died, sifting through his things, I found a gift book I had given him for his birthday: Live Like You Were Dying with a CD of Tim McGraw’s song with the same title. I wrote a message to him: To the only person I know who truly lives like he is dying.
I got into the elevator, smiling from the inside out, infused with a profound sense that I am living every day like it’s my last just as John did; and one day will indeed be my last day. But until then, I hold each day sacred no matter what comes my way. I really know in a way that continue to surprise me that this day, this moment is all I really have. There is a freedom in this; a depth of experiencing life that I didn’t know was possible. This way of being was birthed from my most expensive gift – a byproduct of John’s life and John’s death. I hold my heart, mindful that this life I now know, rich beyond measure cost me everything.
The invitation is to live this day as if it were your last. Let this bring you clarity as to what you want to change, the choices you make that no longer serve you and the choices you need to make now in order to go where you want to go, what you want for your life now instead of being stuck in habits that leave you feeling dull and mechanical, your attitude toward yourself and your life. Remember, how you spend your days is how you spend your life…choice by choice, moment by moment, day by day.