Friday, May 3, 2013

Nashville: Here I am.

I am here.
Here I am in my new home.
New sounds.
New smells.
New sights.
New views.
New experiences.
It is all good!

As I sit on my balcony legs propped with a giant mug of coffee in tow, a candle lit as part of my morning ritual, I give thanks for my life.  I feel so alive as I lean into the newness of everything:  the sounds, the smells, the sights, the views.  This is 180 degrees different than my life out in the country yet it is a seemless transition, no kicking or floundering as I ease into each moment.  Laughter is my reaction to exploring all the unknowns as I delight in my willingness to simply be and roll with whatever comes.

I found my assigned parking space.  Check!  But then couldn’t figure out how to access my condo.  After searching, walking up and down flights of stairs, I found my way to the ground floor and navigated my way home.  As I hopped on the elevator giggling at myself, my new neighbor joined in the fun, matching my stories with her first week living here.  I didn’t know not knowing could be so damn fun.

The movers, Rick and Brian, who work for my friend, MikeyO were so laid back and willing to do whatever needed to be done brought such joy to the day.  They found out while grabbing a sandwich at Subway that Hulk Hogan’s daughter lives in my condo building so they wondered out loud grinning from ear to ear if he might come and help us unload.  While assembling my bed and headboard there were missing pieces but they didn’t sweat it like I would have, they used their genius and finagled this and that to secure it. 

All that came to mind throughout the day was Thank you!  Thank you!  Thank you!  Moving day is probably among the top 5 most stressful days for most but everything was easy.  This is right in line with my intention to make my life easy and it was evidence that it can be.  How wondrous.

After making up my bed with all my new dressings from sheets to covers to pillows which was the one thing I wanted to do by the end of the day, I showered to head out and meet friends for a welcome to Nashville dinner.  I had had only a few hours of sleep the night before but rode this wave of excitement, the energy found in the newness.  As I walked down the street, I found myself smirking with a sense of Here I am.  The surefootedness with each step, the groundedness that I felt throughout my entire body and beyond let me know I was home.  I rested in this.

Dinner was filled with silly bantering as we caught up:  Hey Girl! this, Hey Girl! that; and the sharing of ideas, thoughts as well as celebrating where each of us is at this point on our grand adventure.  We paused to recognize that we are living the dream because we are living a life that is true to who we are, where we are and this made us tear with deep gratitude.  The journey is the reward and for that moment, that capsule of time, we knew this with total clarity.

Arriving home around midnight Indy time, I had been up almost 24 hours but rolled with where I was asking What now?  I lit a candle and headed out to my balcony with a bottle of water, propped my feet onto my bistro table and soaked up the newness.  Nashville was lit with a vibrancy that was beyond the wattage of the lights.  There was live music coming from the restaurant at street level that was the perfect back drop to my 16th floor bird's eye view.

I climbed my weary bones into my bed fit for a queen and just as I started to drift into sleep state, my kitty, Beauty began to wail this dog-like howl that I have never heard before.  I tried to soothe her with my words, my energy, my touch but she could not be consoled so I leaned into it with her.  I found myself even thankful for her expression of grief and sadness for all we have left behind, for all that was, for all we have been through to arrive in our new home, our new life.  There were growing pains that she needed to let out so I let her as I sat in the knowing that everything is okay even when it doesn't feel okay. 

Even when everything lines up beautifully and there is excitement for what is and what is to be, there are bumps that jolt us, there are painful longings, and there are feelings to the contrast.  Let it be.  It is all good! This I know.  

4 comments:

  1. Nashville!! yeah! love this line >> Laughter is my reaction to exploring all the unknowns as I delight in my willingness to simply be and roll with whatever comes.

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    1. Matt, I can see you laughing with me in the exploration of all the unknowns of this journey. YOU ARE SOOOO COOL!! xo

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