Sometimes, we gotta go back to go forward...
We are told to let bygones be bygones by those uncomfortable or threatened by us revisiting our history; but sometimes, it is a necessary to go back to go forward into a life free from the heaviness we have been dragging around. Visiting the past can be healing as we acknowledge all of the experiences - especially the ones we would never have wished for, no longer needing to blame others or wallow in the pain. There may be grief and unwanted feelings to process but there is gold on the other side of the rainbow if we stay the course.
Below is from the INTRO to Passing On Hope written January 11, 2007:
In my look back into what I thought was dark, scary, and overloaded with demons, I discovered an adventure lined with love, laughter, joy, creative survival, perseverance, and gratitude for it all. All those years, I had avoided looking back for fear the pain might take me down for good this time, but the pain amazingly enough dissipated as I faced it little by little. Some of my perceptions were skewed; some of them were dead on. It didn’t matter anymore. As I faced the ugliest parts of myself and my history, I was freed. For the first time I could remember, I felt whole and more present in my life than I knew was possible. The power I had given to the past dulled the joy found in each day, but no more. I wouldn’t allow myself to waste one more moment stuck back there.
My acceptance that my parents, my family, my community, and my teachers did the best they knew how to do stopped my spinning over and over how I wished things could have been. Learning to love myself and all that has led me here today, I am fueled with courage to keep going, to keep dreaming, and to keep believing in the desires of my heart. I feel that there is enough love in this moment to fill the moments of the past where I couldn’t feel it. As I allow this love in, miracles occur within me and around me. I am more than I ever knew was possible, as is everyone I meet. Fear no longer rules my life, as I open to the beauty in life.
I invite you to go back with the intention to acknowledge the truth, to let go, to heal and to reach for MORE as you go forward...spin the lead into GOLD! Find the BEAUTY and let it fill your heart.