My business partner, Tra and I were leaving the attorney's office where we had just drawn up the terms of our legal agreement for our new venture. I was driving and she was in the passenger's seat when out of nowhere I confessed to her as if I was warning her and stripping naked before her, "Tra, I'm a dangerous woman. I don't have the fears or shame that used to bind me."
Her response was priceless, one that could only come from a fellow dangerous woman, "I LOVVVVE IT!" she said without missing a beat with the enthusiasm of a miner striking gold. We began to crack up laughing as I explained that I had no forethought of expressing that declaration and truly had no idea where he came from.
I wanted to shout it out to the world: "My name is Kathy McHugh, and I am a dangerous woman." And I wanted to begin a movement and invite all the dangerous women to rise up and join me in this stand for freedom; all women who refuse to be motivated by our shame-based culture and who have the courage to take fear by the hand and befriend it instead of letting it rule them and their life choices.
The word "dangerous" verses "courageous" denotes a sense of excitement, a sense of the great Odyssey of going within and drinking from the well of soul that is eternally free from the conditioning and constraints of this human life. Whitman poetically invited us to "dismiss whatever insults your soul," as he understood that following the herd, going along to get along, fitting in to the status quo simply isn't possible for all of us. And it must be said by this dangerous woman, committed to a shame-free way of being that there is nothing wrong with those who find a sense of home in the conventional life.
The truth of who each of us is cannot be fully met when we are ashamed of
our thoughts, our desires, our beliefs, our actions; causing us to censor our Self, to be who others need us or expect us to be and dull the aliveness that longs to come out and play.
Learning to fall in love without conditions with our Self, appreciating our Self, flaws and all, owning and delighting in a sense of our Self wholly as human and divine, letting go of abusive perfectionism is a liberation like no other. The more each of us can appreciate ALL that we are as an individual, all the unique aspects, quirks, mannerisms that make us who we are, the more we can appreciate others instead of projecting how we think they should be onto them, shaming them into submission so we can be comfortable instead of threatened by what is different.
Yes, I am idealistic and I am pragmatic. I realize that those two words aren't usually found in the same sentence, but I am a dangerous woman so I am not afraid to be both idealistic and pragmatic. I understand that some will read this and feel the stirring to join me in this liberation and some will think I am just plain nuts. I am okay with both. I have no expectations projected on to you. This simply comes from a deep desire to always share my truth.
All roads lead us back to the Self; to heal, to let go, to reach for more. Here's to the dangerous women who dare to stand up and rock the boat AND here's to the women who have no desire to do so. Making room for both, for all, living an inclusive life is essential for me. Anything less than this insults my soul.